#1 Be kind to yourself. Pregnancy is full of changes: physical, mental and emotional. Take this into consideration and don’t expect yourself to be able to “do it all.” Your body will be home to another living being for the larger part of a year—realize that this special time deserves kindness, understanding and love. So give yourself a break and try to do something nice for yourself at least once a day. (Why not go take a bath right now!)
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see how the American minds of many are tortured by the scale. Eating disorders are rampant, and even if food is not necessarily your foe, weight is a sensitive subject in our culture. Hopefully this changes in the future, but for starters lets at least give pregnant women freedom from weight pressures and encourage them to stay off the scale.
I can’t say enough good things about it.
I had this blog before I found out I was pregnant, but I never had time to be a TTC blog. I got pregnant the first week I tried - the week I got married. Patrick had come back from a brief deployment, and I planned the wedding myself while he was gone. That was how he wanted it, so he had something exciting to come home to. We didn’t want to wait. I even kept the cake I helped design a secret from him, and surprised him with it. Red velvet, his favorite. A six inch heart-shaped cake with a metallic silver fondant anchor & nautical navy blue/white striped ribbon on it. I had just stopped my birth control before he left, and I happened to be ovulating the week of the wedding. I only made one post on here before taking my pregnancy test at 4 weeks. It was about how I was trying to adjust to life in Hawaii.
I started searching the tags for water birth & home birth, and finding other girls who wanted that as much as I did or already had one. Then I started following people who interacted with other people I followed, and soon I was following pregnant girls & mothers from all walks of life. Most of them were much further along than me, and now their babies are sitting up or crawling!
But so many times during my pregnancy, I’d be feeling overwhelmed by something & post about it on here. And women who were pregnant or had been before said they had experienced the same thing. Just knowing that made me feel a million times better. I still do it now that Terry is born. I don’t have any friends out here, and my friends back home didn’t want to talk about Mommy stuff 24/7. So tumblr was the only reason I didn’t feel completely alone. With us being stationed out here, we never had a real wedding. We eloped on the beach. And I never had a baby shower. We bought baby stuff on our own, and I found myself saying to Patrick, “Moms on tumblr love this product.”
Mom friends on Facebook thought that Time Magazine cover was “disgusting.” I came on here & found other people who loved the idea of extended breastfeeding & unschooling. They didn’t think I was crazy. But I was also following Mommies who had different views from me. I wanted to vaccinate, and circumcise if my baby were a boy. I got anonymous hate mail for that & it was awful. However, I did not argue with Mommies who posted information against it. I didn’t unfollow them. I liked these women. Mainly naturalmomma & mquester. I didn’t even blacklist their circumcision posts, or tell them to stop posting about it on their blogs. I read their information, further researched it myself, and talked to my husband about it. I figured I could never read too much about my choices for my baby. It wasn’t possible to be too informed about the pros and cons of all my options.
So you can get a lot out of this site if you want to. And I certainly have. I can’t wait for more people I follow to have their babies. I want to read birth stories & watch their children grow up. I can’t wait to share Terry’s milestones with my followers, or post about the details of his first birthday that only other mumblrs would care about.
POSTPARTUM GIVEAWAY
I had a lot of fun doing the LUSH Christmas Package giveaway for people guessing “Baby Tucker’s” sex and birth date. Now I am doing another giveaway to celebrate how not-pregnant I am!
The Loot:
HeavenlyLabor Aromatic Massage Oil - Only a few drops used.
Nature’s Birth Drops - Only a few drops used when labor stalled - 100% effective!
Tranquil Aromatic BirthBath - Never opened. Everything happened too fast.
Mama Bottom Balm - Never opened. I used the Mama Bottom Spray instead.
$68 value
The Rules:
1. You do not need to follow me. I prefer having followers that actually read my blog & interact with me. I just want these wonderful products to go to an expecting mama.
2. To enter, you need to reblog this to circulate it AND send a question to my Ask box. The question can be anything. About me, Terry, my pregnancy, my birth, how motherhood is going.
3. I will be making a video this weekend to answer the questions, and the video will feature a 6-week-old Terry. I will be posting it. The person with the most interesting question wins!
4. Where you live doesn’t matter, I will ship to anywhere in the world. Just please be pregnant.
5. Deadline is Sunday, January 27, 7 am Hawaii time.
Go!
I am 10 months pregnant, and still sleeping just fine. Usually 8-9 hours a night, either waking up once or not at all. I do not have a body pillow or think I’d find one useful. I have said many times that I wear rainbow moonstone & amethyst bracelets to sleep. I don’t think many people take me seriously when I say that, but oh well, their loss :).
Yesterday Patrick ran 26 miles in under 5 hours, and he hadn’t trained for it at all. Needless to say, he came home quite sore & exhausted. Out of about 32,000 runners, he finished in the 4,000’s. And out of all the sailors on his boat who participated, he came in second. The guy who was first does long distance running all the time, though. Patrick just wanted to beat his Senior Chief who he has a very competitive friendship with, and he did that LOL.
He came home and sat in the shower for a while with hot water pouring over him, and we talked about how I have always thought labor/childbirth was like a marathon. We talked about how you must pace yourself, stay hydrated, and how it’s amazing endorphins & feelings of accomplishment mixed with being famished at the end. Then he took a nap for a few hours. He actually woke up at 3 am to get ready for it, because it started at 5 & it was hard to find parking for it in Honolulu. So that nap was much needed.
While he napped, I was feeling energetic myself, cleaning up our place. I was so glad I didn’t go into labor that morning! He said he would’ve sucked it up & been there for me. But I’d prefer both of us be at 100% when the day comes. So I took care of him as he will be taking care of me soon. I even cooked lunch for us when he woke up - something I never do! I made organic sushi rice with organic rice vinegar, seaweed, toasted sesame seeds, steamed zucchini, squash & peppers, spices, and organic soy sauce. And I made organic potatoes, rubbed with extra virgin olive oil & Hawaiian sea salt, baked, and topped with grass-fed butter & grated parmesan. I brought him white grape juice & electrolyte charged water, and I massaged him. We watched Alfie on Netflix.
He was feeling better this morning before going into work, but said he’s probably not going to the gym or doing CrossFit tonight. When he gets home from work, we’ll do a 52 weeks shot of me. Can’t believe I’m 41 weeks + 3 days!
I’m still feeling good, and getting so excited. We’ve had the birthing pool set up in the baby’s room since the false labor, but I sat in it for the first time yesterday. I feel like I am finally ready. When I had the false labor, I wasn’t. I was scared, and I wanted just a little more time to be pregnant with this baby.. Knowing I’ll never get that time back. I’m grateful I had a bit longer to carry them, and that the painful Prodromal labor went away.. Because I could not get through more weeks of that. I might cry when they cut the umbilical cord.. I want to stay attached to this baby forever. Maybe because I lost Brennan. But I feel at peace now, like the time has come to let go & give birth, allowing them to become their own person separate from me. I’m ready to meet them.
I wanted to share this link with all of you, because it’s PROFOUND.
This tape is mostly for athletes, or people with injuries. My husband got it because he gets sore a lot from CrossFit and other things he does, and he’s running a marathon this morning. But they had pictures of pregnant women using it on the website, so he decided to use it on me.
He put it on my back, and you can leave it on for several days. It can even get wet, so you can keep it on in the shower or bath. So I pretty much forgot it was there, and felt great for a few days.
Then I had him take it off me when we showered together last night, because I saw him removing his. Within a few hours, my back hurt SO bad. Which isn’t uncommon for someone 10 months pregnant, petite, and carrying 40 extra pounds in their midsection. He put the tape back on, and I swear to you.. I instantly felt better. My back still hurt, but not half as much. I slept well. Woke up this morning, and I have no pain whatsoever.
I just had a great appointment with my midwife, as usual. First it was supposed to be at 2:15 pm, but it was pushed back to 3:00. That ended up working out perfectly. Patrick called me around 2, getting off work early & thinking of heading to the gym. Instead, he came home so he could make the appointment with me. We got there right on time, but nobody was in the office yet. So we went & got cupcakes from our favorite local place right around the corner! For ourselves, my midwife & her receptionist. I had a white chocolate peppermint one.
My midwife noticed that I was smiling and seemed much happier than the last time I was in her office.. about a week ago. That was right after my experience with the false labor & triggering memories of my abusive childhood, so I was pretty shaken up that time.
Patrick mentioned that I have a pregnancy blog where I wrote about my experience, and got a lot of support from all my wonderful friends on here that made me feel better. So she said she wanted to read it! That made me feel a bit shy & awkward, and Patrick told her to just Google “Tiayra Tucker tumblr” which she wrote down, LOL. But all my “real life” friends and in-laws read this blog, and I get over 500 page views a day of people checking up on me, so I guess it doesn’t matter. I mean, I lose followers every time I post the Flashback Friday or maternity art nudes, but I’m gonna be naked for my home birth anyways, so that can’t be too offensive to her :).
We took my weight “one last time” - hopefully, right? And I was amazed that I’ve gained another 3 lbs over the past week! I am now 147 lbs. I only got up to 137 lbs with Brennan before I started dropping weight. I never thought my body could do this. I’m impressed. My fundal height actually went down though! From 37 cm to 36 cm. Because the baby moved down lower. And this happened within the past 24 hours. Their movements last night & today have felt very different to me. Instead of feeling little feet or knees up near my ribs, I distinctly feel their head moving near my mons pubis. It is quite uncomfortable, but a good sign. They are in a better position than they were previously. But still moving around a lot. And have a healthy heart rate of 140. I’m so proud of my baby!
Then my midwife wanted to talk to me about how I’m feeling. She recently got my files from my OB/GYN that I was seeing before her, and she saw in the notes that I have Asperger’s. I guess I never thought to mention it, because I always feel so comfortable with her. But she is quite touchy-feely, always giving hugs, so she said I should tell her if I’m ever uncomfortable. This time it was me who initiated the hug at the end of our appointment, which was nice. But she was willing to listen to anything I wanted to talk about, if there were more issues.. besides the freak out about my step-father last week. So I told her how I’m terrified of being induced like everyone around me. And she said luckily I don’t have to worry about that!
Apparently, she has never “made” anyone go to the hospital and get on Cytotec or Pitocin. So that was a relief. She has caught babies that were as late as 43 weeks. She said if anything, we could do herbal things like cohosh - just as I thought she’d say. That made me so happy. And she said she doesn’t recommend castor oil! Thank God. I’m already pooping like crazy, I don’t need to add to that. She did not check my cervix, because that’s not important. And she did not seem concerned for me. We did not make another appointment. She said if I don’t have the baby by next Friday (42 weeks) then we’ll do another appointment, and talk about natural things to help the labor along. Not hospital induction! She made no mention of ultrasounds or non-stress tests. And she has faith in me to go into labor naturally before I reach 42 weeks, anyways.
So once again, I left there feeling very good.
Patrick had asked me before the appointment how I felt about something. There is this 26-mile marathon on Sunday he’d been wanting to do, but he figured the baby would be here by now. And he thought it’d cost more to register than it does. He wanted to go register tonight. He said if I have the baby before then, he won’t go.. but he won’t be out by much money. And if he does do the marathon on Sunday, he’ll keep his phone on him. He has an arm band for his iPhone. So if I went into labor, he’d take a taxi home. I was completely fine with this plan, and he said I was the best wife ever. I just don’t think Patrick should have to put his life on hold right now. I mean, whether he’s at work or running a marathon, I’m not gonna go into labor & pop the baby out in 30 minutes or anything. He’ll have time to reach me. So I’m not worried. He is out registering for it right now.
Tomorrow is his 29th birthday. We don’t have any plans, but we will have to do something nice. It might be our last date together for a while!
Last night, Patrick and I were shopping in the commissary. This woman came up to me, exclaiming that I was the cutest pregnant girl EVER. I thanked her, and she added, “Keep it up!”
At this rate, I just might?
I have an appointment with my midwife this afternoon. My first appointment with her I’ve ever gone to alone, because Patrick will be at work. I feel so, so very blessed that it’s a simple appointment. Not an induction or ultrasound or membrane sweep or anything crazy that a doctor would be doing at this point.
I was late getting my period, too. I was 14 years old and a freshman in high school. All my friends had already gotten theirs. That’s kind of what this feels like when I see so many people on tumblr having their baby before me. Then I remember that a lot of them were induced. And I thank God that my body is being given the chance to do what it can.
Once I got my period, I would’ve given it a gold star. It came every 28 days, never late. It lasted exactly 2 days. And I never had any premenstrual symptoms. I’ve never been one of those girls with awful cramping or anything. I’ve also conceived a baby the moment I’ve tried twice now, and my first labor was natural and pain free. I trust my body.
About A Mermaid, A Sailor, and A Baby
